You’re Not Burnt Out, You’re Just Surrounded by Idiots

By Vikki

Look, you’re not actually burnt out. You’re just exposed to humans on a regular basis. And not the smart ones. The other ones. The ones who ask questions Google could answer in 0.003 seconds.

Burnout isn’t always caused by stress, trauma, or lack of sleep. Sometimes it’s caused by Brenda from accounts who emails you every 11 minutes asking, “Can you resend that thing?”

Symptom #1: People Keep Asking You Stupid Questions

No Susan, I cannot “quickly” teach you something that takes 47 steps and a degree in patience I do not currently possess.

---

Symptom #2: Every Conversation Feels Like Tech Support

• “Where’s that document?”
• “What’s my password?”
• “Is the printer broken or am I pressing it wrong?”

At this point, you should invoice for emotional labour.

---

Symptom #3: Meetings That Should Have Been A Message

I swear half of life is just meetings about future meetings that lead to another meeting about the first meeting. Send a pigeon. It would be faster.

---

Symptom #4: You’re Doing Everyone Else’s Job

You started as an employee. Somehow you’ve become:

• therapist
• IT support
• project manager
• Google
• professional problem absorber

---

Symptom #5: You Don’t Hate Work… You Hate People

The job is fine. The humans are exhausting. Burnout level: 9000.

---

Symptom #6: You Hide From People

The bathroom is now your emotional panic room. You don’t even need to pee. You’re just avoiding humanity.

---

Symptom #7: You’ve Started Ignoring Messages On Purpose

Not because you forgot. Because you don’t want to. That’s called self-care, baby.

---

Let’s Be Honest…

Burnout isn’t the problem. It’s:

• stupidity
• chaos
• unnecessary drama
• lack of common sense

Your nervous system isn’t broken—it’s in self-defense mode.

---

So What’s the Cure?

• headphones
• fake meetings
• “I’ll get back to you”
• disable notifications
• put your phone face down and walk away

“Sorry, I’m not available for other people’s nonsense today.”

---

Final Diagnosis:

Burnout: ❌
People-induced brain damage: ✔️

---

Comment this: What’s the dumbest thing someone asked you this week?
I’ll go first: “Do ovens need to preheat?”

Disclaimer: This is humorous content for entertainment only (and emotional survival). If you’re experiencing severe burnout, seek proper mental health support.