Skip to main content

Featured

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident I never noticed the closeness being built. I just assumed it was love, and assumed what I owed because of it, without either of us ever saying it out loud. Short version: Trauma bonding is usually described as something that happens to you, almost by accident, through unpredictable reward. A 2025 Cambridge study, interviewing eighteen women with sustained attachment to abusive partners, found something sharper underneath that: the closeness itself is often deliberately constructed early on, specifically so it can be exploited later. Researchers call this attachment weaponisation. The unsettling part is that it isn't always obvious while it's happening. It can feel completely organic, right up until you realise how much invisible obligation got built into it along the way. What is attachment weaponisation? A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Cambridge, published in the journal Violence Aga...
Post a Comment
Read more
Labels

Mum Diary 7am - Why Today Is Going To Be A Beautiful “Nothing Day”

It’s 7am.


And I can already tell today is going to be one of those glorious, peaceful, “nothing” days… and I genuinely cannot wait.


Today will just be:


  • school run
  • work
  • home
  • dinner
  • bed



No extra commitments.

No chaos.

No drama.

No favours.

No extra emotional labour.


Just the basic rhythm of life — and it will feel like heaven.



Because I’ve had years where every day felt like a war



Years where I was constantly waiting for the next explosion, the next accusation, the next drama message, the next stress-punch to the nervous system.


So now, a day where nothing big is happening?


That’s a sign of safety.


It’s proof that I don’t live inside a storm anymore.



Today will be the kind of day where the body actually repairs



It’s not the dramatic breakthroughs that heal us.


It’s the normal days.


The ordinary days.


The days that aren’t a crisis.


Because that’s when the nervous system learns:


“We are safe now.”


Today I’ll make a couple coffees, do my work, maybe scroll a bit, pick my kid up from school, cook something normal, and be in bed early.


That is the whole plan.


And that is enough.



Today I’m letting “just being” be the win



Today will not require me to rescue anyone.

It won’t require me to fix anyone.

It won’t require me to overthink anything.


Today is just me, doing my routine, being a mum, earning my money, feeling calm in my own life.


Nothing extra.


Nothing heavy.


Nothing dramatic.


Just peace.


And honestly — that’s fucking amazing.


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment