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Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident I never noticed the closeness being built. I just assumed it was love, and assumed what I owed because of it, without either of us ever saying it out loud. Short version: Trauma bonding is usually described as something that happens to you, almost by accident, through unpredictable reward. A 2025 Cambridge study, interviewing eighteen women with sustained attachment to abusive partners, found something sharper underneath that: the closeness itself is often deliberately constructed early on, specifically so it can be exploited later. Researchers call this attachment weaponisation. The unsettling part is that it isn't always obvious while it's happening. It can feel completely organic, right up until you realise how much invisible obligation got built into it along the way. What is attachment weaponisation? A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Cambridge, published in the journal Violence Aga...
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Lazy Sunday Rituals

Lazy Sunday Rituals

Published Oct 12, 2025 · Family & Life · 3 min read

Lazy Sunday rituals — lying in bed after two cups of tea, writing this blog post. I don’t even know why, really. Maybe because it’s just one of those quiet days where writing feels like company.

So today is my dad’s birthday. We’re probably going to the pub for a roast dinner — we always do. I’m looking forward to seeing what he thinks of all his chocolates, although I don’t think I’m going to give it to him in front of everyone. It’s a bit weirdly embarrassing, so I think I’ll just give it to him in secret. It feels like something between him and us — a quiet little family thing.

And that’s about it, really. It’s a lazy Sunday. Roast dinner, family, a bit of laughter, and that’s enough.

My daughter’s nagging me to put up her shelf, so I’ve got to get the Makita drill out, hang some brackets, and maybe even a few pictures that have been waiting for weeks. A girl with a Makita — I bet you’re well impressed.

Not much else to say. Just a slow, gentle Sunday. Have a nice day everyone — enjoy your Sunday.

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