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Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident I never noticed the closeness being built. I just assumed it was love, and assumed what I owed because of it, without either of us ever saying it out loud. Short version: Trauma bonding is usually described as something that happens to you, almost by accident, through unpredictable reward. A 2025 Cambridge study, interviewing eighteen women with sustained attachment to abusive partners, found something sharper underneath that: the closeness itself is often deliberately constructed early on, specifically so it can be exploited later. Researchers call this attachment weaponisation. The unsettling part is that it isn't always obvious while it's happening. It can feel completely organic, right up until you realise how much invisible obligation got built into it along the way. What is attachment weaponisation? A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Cambridge, published in the journal Violence Aga...
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how to deal with an alcoholic spouse

 I know all too well how difficult it is living with an alcoholic spouse. Their unpredictable, you feel like your walking on egg shells and you feel your life is on hold. 

My first advice is , it’s not your fault and you can not change them. The only way there going to change is on their own or with a therapist if you believe in that crap! 

So let’s start with a typical day! Where do I start morning or evening!!! 

They wake up the wrong side of midday, their moody, drink copious amounts of coffee, smoke copious amounts of cigarettes, maybe eat something, then 5pm comes around and their drinking again!!! Need I say more!!! It only stops when they get a job that starts early and they can’t drink at risk of loosing that funding for their habits!!! 

Your life is on hold, you feel imprisoned, you just want FREEDOM RAHHHH

Well this can happen, you just need to be strong. Write a list of projects, fun things to do & go, get up early every morning and just do it. 

You are the creator of your life, no one can tell you how to live it apart from you…. 



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