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Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident I never noticed the closeness being built. I just assumed it was love, and assumed what I owed because of it, without either of us ever saying it out loud. Short version: Trauma bonding is usually described as something that happens to you, almost by accident, through unpredictable reward. A 2025 Cambridge study, interviewing eighteen women with sustained attachment to abusive partners, found something sharper underneath that: the closeness itself is often deliberately constructed early on, specifically so it can be exploited later. Researchers call this attachment weaponisation. The unsettling part is that it isn't always obvious while it's happening. It can feel completely organic, right up until you realise how much invisible obligation got built into it along the way. What is attachment weaponisation? A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Cambridge, published in the journal Violence Aga...

How to raise your standards

  1.  Do your hair
  2. Dress nicely
  3. Wear perfume
  4. Clean your teeth 4 times a day
  5. Only eat healthy food
  6. Drink plenty of fluids not wine! 
  7. Only say nice things
  8. Do impeccable work for your clients 
  9. Keep your house and car incredibly clean
  10. always be learning new skills 
  11. Help people every day
  12. Be happy 
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