Just Do Weird Shit: A Week of Genuinely Strange Ways to Have Fun No gratitude lists. No journaling. Just a week of doing slightly deranged things on purpose, because life is allowed to be funny and nobody told you. The whole point: Somewhere along the way, "having fun" turned into a wellness routine with rules. This isn't that. This is a week of doing genuinely odd, specific, unnecessary things purely because they'll make you laugh or make someone else's day weird in a good way. Business, meetings, tax returns — fine, be serious there. Everywhere else, you're allowed to be an idiot on purpose. DAY 1 Put Coke in Your Coffee Yes, really. Do it once. Don't ask why, just do it and report back to yourself whether it's revolting or secretly incredible. Either outcome is a win, because now you know, and knowing weird things about caffeine combinations is a personality trait. DAY 2 Marmite and Honey on Toast Sounds like a crime. Isn...
What to Say When Someone Asks Why You're Not Drinking
What to Say When Someone Asks Why You're Not Drinking
Short answer: nothing. You don't owe a stranger, a colleague, or your auntie at Christmas a written statement. Here's what to say instead.
Short version: You don't need a reason not to drink, and you definitely don't need a good one. "I'm not drinking tonight" is a complete sentence. If someone pushes past that, the problem is their manners, not your explanation. Below is a range of responses, from breezy to blunt, depending on how much patience you've got left.
Somehow, in a world where nobody blinks if you order a sparkling water instead of a second glass of wine because you're driving, people still manage to treat "I'm not drinking" as an opening for cross-examination. It isn't. It's a complete sentence. You don't need to justify it, medicalise it, or apologise for it.
The line for people who just need one
"Not tonight, thanks."
"I'm good with this." (holding up whatever you're actually drinking)
"Just not feeling it tonight."
All of these work because they don't open a door. No reason given means no reason to argue with.
For the person who asks twice
"I said I'm not drinking — how's your evening going?" (redirect, don't explain)
"Nope, still not drinking. Wild, I know."
"I'll let you know if that changes."
For the person who won't let it go
At some point, "why aren't you drinking" stops being curiosity and starts being a demand for a performance. You're allowed to stop being polite about it.
"Genuinely none of your business, but nice try."
"I don't ask why you are, so let's leave it there."
Or, if you've truly had enough: tell them to fuck off. You're allowed. Nobody has ever died from a slightly awkward silence at a party.
One honest note
If you're not drinking because you're in recovery, and you'd rather have a simple, low-drama line ready than get into it, "I'm not drinking, and I'd rather not talk about it" is a complete, dignified answer too. You don't owe anyone your reasons, whatever they are, and nobody gets to make you defend a decision that was never theirs to approve in the first place.
Frequently asked questions
Do I need to explain why I'm not drinking?+
No. "I'm not drinking" is a complete answer on its own. You're not required to provide a reason, medical or otherwise, to justify a personal choice about alcohol.
What's a polite way to shut down repeated questions about not drinking?+
Redirecting the conversation without re-engaging the question tends to work well, such as acknowledging you've answered and changing the subject, rather than offering a new or more detailed explanation.
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