10 Signs You’re Not Broken, You’re Just Surrounded by Arseholes

Ever wondered “What’s wrong with me?” after yet another fight, ghosting, or passive-aggressive comment? Spoiler alert: probably nothing. You’re not broken. You’re just swimming in a sea of professional-grade arseholes.

Let’s diagnose the situation.

1. You Feel Drained After Every Interaction

It’s not because you’re “too sensitive.” It’s because Brenda from HR talks like her voice is powered by a dementor. Some people are energy vampires. You’re not weak — you’re just fresh meat on their emotional buffet.

2. You Constantly Apologise (For Existing)

Ever notice you’re sorry for EVERYTHING? “Sorry I’m late.” “Sorry I exist.” “Sorry the weather is bad.” You’re not broken. You’ve just been trained by arseholes who treat your boundaries like a speed bump.

3. They Gaslight You Into Oblivion

You: “That really hurt my feelings.”

Them: “You’re imagining it.”

No, Karen. I’m not imagining — I’m watching you be a Grade-A twat in 4K resolution.

4. You’re the ‘Problem Solver’ in Every Crisis

Family drama? You fix it. Work disaster? You fix it. Friend meltdown? You fix it. Meanwhile, everyone else is sitting around like potatoes with Wi-Fi. You’re not broken — you’re just the designated adult in a world full of toddlers.

5. You Second-Guess Every Decision

Not because you’re indecisive — but because every time you made a choice, some arsehole had “feedback.” It’s like living with your own personal TripAdvisor reviewer, but for your LIFE.

6. People Take Advantage of Your Kindness

Let’s be real: if you had £1 for every time someone mistook your kindness for weakness, you could buy an island and live arsehole-free. You’re not broken. You’re just too nice to people who deserve to be yeeted into the sun.

7. You’ve Forgotten What Peace Feels Like

If “relaxing” means waiting for the next outburst, spoiler: you’re not broken. You’re in arsehole-induced fight-or-flight. Your nervous system is basically a Chihuahua on Red Bull.

8. You Wonder If You’re the Crazy One

Classic gaslighting symptom. If you’re asking, “Am I the problem?” — you’re probably not. The people who are the problem never wonder. They’re too busy being human dumpster fires.

9. Your Self-Esteem Tanked For No Reason

You used to feel okay about yourself. Then you met them. And now you’re Googling “am I broken?” at 2am. Nope. You’re just in proximity to someone who treats confidence like a crime.

10. You’re Reading This Post

If you’re here, you’ve already clocked that something’s off. And guess what? It ain’t you. You’re not broken. You’re just orbiting Planet Arsehole — and it’s time to book a one-way ticket out.

Final Word

You’re fine. Better than fine. You’ve just been conditioned by arseholes who wouldn’t know emotional intelligence if it hit them with a frying pan. Step one to feeling amazing again? Stop diagnosing yourself as broken — start diagnosing your environment as arsehole-infested.

Now go shine, you unbroken legend. And maybe block a few people on the way.