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Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident

Attachment Weaponisation: The Bond Was Never an Accident I never noticed the closeness being built. I just assumed it was love, and assumed what I owed because of it, without either of us ever saying it out loud. Short version: Trauma bonding is usually described as something that happens to you, almost by accident, through unpredictable reward. A 2025 Cambridge study, interviewing eighteen women with sustained attachment to abusive partners, found something sharper underneath that: the closeness itself is often deliberately constructed early on, specifically so it can be exploited later. Researchers call this attachment weaponisation. The unsettling part is that it isn't always obvious while it's happening. It can feel completely organic, right up until you realise how much invisible obligation got built into it along the way. What is attachment weaponisation? A 2025 study led by researchers at the University of Cambridge, published in the journal Violence Aga...
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I Need a Hug

I Need a Hug | How to Feel Fucking Amazing
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How to Feel Fucking Amazing

I Need a Hug

By Vikki  ·  1 min read

There. I said it. The thing most of us are too proud, too tired, or too used to coping alone to ever actually admit.

Sometimes life asks too much of you. You carry it all — the bills, the kids, the work, the worry — and you just keep going because what else are you supposed to do?

But somewhere underneath all that strength is a person who just wants someone to hold them for a minute. To feel like they don't have to carry it alone. Just for a moment.

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If nobody has told you lately — you are doing an incredible job. And it's okay to need more than you're getting right now.

Needing a hug doesn't make you weak. It makes you human. The strongest people I know are the ones who can finally admit when they're running on empty.

So if you're reading this and you need a hug too — consider this it. You are seen. You are not alone. And you are so much more loved than you know.

With so much warmth,

Vikki 🌸

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