How to Get Your Sense of Humour Back
There’s a moment you notice it.
You’re not laughing like you used to.
Things that once felt light now feel irritating.
Sarcasm feels sharp instead of funny.
You don’t find much amusing.
And you quietly think:
What happened to me?
If your sense of humour feels gone, it’s not random.
It’s usually a stress signal.
Humour Requires Safety
Humour is not just personality.
It’s nervous system regulation.
When your body feels safe, your brain allows:
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Playfulness
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Creativity
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Wit
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Lightness
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Social bonding
When you’re stressed, overwhelmed, or emotionally carrying too much, your brain shifts into survival mode.
Survival mode does not prioritize humour.
It prioritizes scanning for threat.
You can’t laugh freely while bracing.
The Usual Culprits
If your humour feels muted, check for:
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Chronic stress
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Burnout
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Relationship tension
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Financial pressure
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Sleep deprivation
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Emotional resentment
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Unprocessed grief
Heavy load reduces play.
It doesn’t mean you’ve changed permanently.
It means your system is tired.
The Subtle Sign of Emotional Exhaustion
Losing your humour is often one of the first signs that:
You’ve been carrying too much for too long.
You may still function.
Still show up.
Still handle everything.
But internally, you’re tight.
And tight people don’t laugh easily.
Step 1: Reduce Threat, Not Force Fun
You don’t get humour back by trying to be funny.
You get it back by lowering stress.
Start with basics:
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Sleep.
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Reduce caffeine.
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Move your body.
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Cut unnecessary commitments.
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Stop over-engaging in draining conversations.
Humour returns when tension drops.
Step 2: Reintroduce Play Intentionally
Play is a skill you can rebuild.
Try:
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Watching stand-up comedy.
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Rewatching something that once made you laugh.
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Spending time with people who are naturally light.
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Letting yourself be slightly silly without self-judgment.
At first, it may feel forced.
That’s normal.
Play feels unnatural when you’ve been serious for too long.
Step 3: Check for Resentment
Resentment quietly kills humour.
If you’re constantly:
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Managing others.
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Over-functioning.
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Suppressing frustration.
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Feeling unsupported.
Your body stays guarded.
Guarded people don’t joke freely.
Ask:
Where am I carrying more than I should?
Sometimes humour returns when balance improves.
Step 4: Allow Emotional Range
Sometimes losing humour isn’t about stress.
It’s about grief.
If you’ve experienced:
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Loss
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Divorce
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Identity shifts
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Major life changes
Your system may need time.
You don’t bypass grief with jokes.
You move through it.
And lightness slowly reappears.
When It Might Be More Than Stress
If loss of humour is paired with:
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Persistent low mood
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Emotional numbness
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Loss of interest in everything
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Ongoing fatigue
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Social withdrawal
It may be depression.
Organizations like the National Alliance on Mental Illness provide guidance on recognizing depression and seeking support.
There is no weakness in checking.
The Truth About Humour
Humour isn’t immaturity.
It’s resilience.
It’s the ability to:
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See absurdity in difficulty.
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Not take every mistake as identity.
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Release tension socially.
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Stay flexible under pressure.
When humour disappears, flexibility shrinks.
Getting it back is not about being funnier.
It’s about being safer internally.
Final Truth
If your sense of humour feels gone, you’re not broken.
You’re likely overloaded.
Lower the pressure.
Lighten the load.
Reintroduce play.
Address resentment.
Rest your nervous system.
And one day you’ll notice:
You laughed.
Naturally.
That’s your resilience returning.
Quietly.
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